So, Uh… The Saturday That Was

5 Oct

This past Saturday was different from the typical, boring, monotonous, routine, humdrum, lonely long weekend day that I usually wallow through. I was actually fairly busy throughout the entire day although some of that busyness was spent in a place I never want to visit ever again.

Waking up at eight on a Saturday may seem like a waste to most. However, I was on a mission. For you see, I live in Minneapolis, but work out on Saturday mornings in St. Paul. Normally, this isn’t that big of a deal since I own a car and there is little traffic to deal with on these brisk mornings. Also, the class starts at 10, so normally I can sleep in a little as it only takes but 15 minutes to drive there. Today, however, I got it in my head that I would bike to the workout class. Thankfully, Minneapolis has a bevy of biking trails and getting from where I live to where I work out is actually a pretty straight shot without the need to deal with too many busy streets (or if they are busy, they include a bike lane). The only problem with this is that it takes time, and was about 45 degrees outside that day. True, it was bright and sunny, but it was also windy. All in all, it took me 45 minutes to get to my destination – Angel’s Life Solutions, which was about 7.5 miles away, just off Marshall Ave (according to Google maps). This workout class I attend is all about stretching and kettlebells. It’s a fairly strenuous workout from which I am still sore right now (it being Tuesday). After working out, I biked home, though at a much more leisurely pace as I had only eaten two bananas before setting out.

I knew at some point during the day that I would have to go to the hospital. On Monday, my grandmother had had a stroke. She has had them before, and it really sucks to have to see someone who is already so frail become even more delicate. After driving to the wrong hospital in Woodbury – which is where my grandparents live and the hospital she normally has been at, but somehow, the info of where she was actually at was not relayed to me – I eventually drove back to St. Paul and St. Joseph’s. Suffice it to say that it was the most depressing part of my day and I don’t want to keep going through it every few months. Hospitals are not places that I tend to come out of feeling better about things based on past history with them. So to try and get my mind off of that, I went to an art gallery on the way home.

St. Joseph's Hospital room

St. Joseph's Hospital room

I had been wanting to see the Spinal Tap “Smell the Glove” exhibit since I heard about it, and this was the last day of the show. The motive behind the show was that, in the classic movie, the band Spinal Tap has a record coming out called “Smell the Glove” but the label decides at the last moment that the cover art would be too racy and obscene. Since the cover is never actually shown and merely described, the art gallery enlisted a bunch of local artists to come up with their idea of what that cover would actually look like, had it been seen in the film. Thus, we get a ton of weird ass looking art – including actual semen on a sock (under glass thank god) – that is both terrifyingly close to the description in the film and outlandishly ridiculous at the same time. Also, that screen is there because, for the final night of the exhibit, they were going to show the film as a final send off.

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

Spinal Tap "Smell the Glove"

The rest of my day was spent making supper and playing video games, neither of which need to be seen as they are pretty boring. Oh yeah, I also have television now, so I watched SNL just to see Abby Elliott. She is the best thing about that show right now… because she is hot.

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